|
Hello~ I'm Kimmy. An 18 year old, graphic design student residing in the USA. I'm in love with photoshopping, Johnny's Entertainment & kpop I love spending weekends with my family. I've also got a love for big cities. So living right by New York City is pretty nice. "Isn't an 'otokomae' a kind person?--everyone has times they are cold, but being able to be kind when kindness is needed is otokomae. A person who can sense when others are feeling weak and take action is cool." - 増田貴久 |
|
|
sunday morning
 ( 1 2 3 4 5)  : キッス~帰り道のラブソング- テゴマスkissu
teatime
♥ ♥ ♥
      archives
credits
Design: doughnutcrazyIcon: okimiyage |
off topic a bit.
the essay is coming along fine. slowly but fine. I've found that this past year, I've begun to grow closer to God. Closer than ever. I guess its perfect timing. I'll be on my own soon and I'll need guidance. I see things differently now. I see people differently. Never in my life have I thought this way about things. (please play video at the end of this post while you read) There was this boy see... Never have I been so close to a boy before. (I've never been in a real relationship, yup no boyfriend...ever) I really thought he could possibly be my first. Then I saw his true colors. The sweet, deep, smart boy I thought I knew was different. He wanted nothing from me but sex. In school he would touch me. It was always a cold touch...a cold touch that I knew wanted only one thing. But I'd allow him to touch me...I've always wanted a boy to hold me. I was desperate. Pathetic. Girls long for a boy to hold them, its only natural. I was really convinced I loved this boy. It went on for years. on and off. No real relationship ever established. Just a girl that fulfilled his desires when convenient. I never had the guts to fully give in. I'm still a virgin, but I remember many times where I was ready to come over, late a night, just to make him happy. I'm glad I never did. I found out today that boy has a girlfriend. I prayed for him. I hope he treats that girl well. But if hes treating her like he treated me...I really hope she realizes. A girl should never be treated like what he treated me. Its been a few months since I talked to him last. I prayed about it many times. I finally see that you shouldn't give yourself away just to please a boy. Giving yourself to someone like that isn't going to guarantee they will fall madly in love with you and want to spend forever with you. In a way I thank the boy. He's made my skin thicker. He's made me realize I deserve much better. I'm going to start wearing a purity ring. To remind me of the promise I made to myself and God. I'm a virgin and I plan on staying one until I really do find my soul mate. I do have to admit though... I would still like a boyfriend though ...someone sweet, genuine, smart, and definitely funny. Someone who'll see that there is more to me than what meets the eye. I would just like someone to hold hands with and cuddle with really.
Wish me luck. ♥ Kimberly Grace By the wonderful Rilo Kiley. |